Archive For The “life lessons” Category
Don’t you want to know how to make life better? Doesn’t everyone?
Most people, sooner or later, start asking what I like to call “ultimate questions.” They tend to ask them in a number of ways, but nearly all of them focus on the quest for a better life.
Unfortunately, many people don’t give those questions much attention. They’ve got too many messages in their outbox to consider issues with no deadline, no matter how important they seem.
I’m not talking about just better living — making a few extra bucks or driving a nicer car. I’m talking about the quality of your life. Something that gets your juice flowing. Something worth living for.
I had a professor once, who would often say about various philosophers, “I’m not sure if I agree with his answers, but I sure like the questions.” In a sense, the questions are more important than the answers. Or perhaps the search for the answers is more important than the answers themselves.
You learn how to make life better but starting with a close look at yourself.
Many people just do what they’ve always done. Somewhere along the way, their dreams got pushed aside so many times that they don’t even notice they’re gone.
Good news: those hopes, dreams and aspirations can be called back. The first step is to actually recall them. Remember them. Bring them back to mind. Give them new life.
You have that power. Consider what it would take to make those dreams a reality. If that task seems too daunting, start with just a portion of a dream.
What one thing could you do that would help you learn how to make life better? What’s a small accomplishment that would get positive momentum building in your favor?
What would you have to do? How could you do it?
Take at least a few moments every day to consider these questions. You’ll notice a difference almost immediately.
Once you start focusing on how to make life better, the means of making life better will start to reveal themselves. Life will be better simply because you’re looking for ways to make life better.
The other day, I learned a valuable lesson about the need to have confidence in music and in life.
The band I play in had just went through a tough rehearsal. We were supposed to play the next day, and to say we were struggling would be kind. We’d tried to learn a few new songs, and all but one were bad. Real bad.
We finally replaced a few of the harder songs with easier tunes, but our music was still pretty rough. When we started playing, I thought about some advice a piano teacher gave me years ago. I was nervous just before a recital and she said, “Steve, if you mess up, just keep going and no one will notice.”
I’m not sure she was being completely truthful, but her suggestion helped calm me down and helped me play better, I’m sure. Since then I’ve thought of her words many times.
So when we started playing the other day, I decided to play with confidence. I knew that if I played tentatively I would almost certainly mess up.
I don’t know if the other band members picked up on it, but I do know that we played better than we had at any time during practice.
I thought later how the music lesson also applies to life. Confidence is often the difference between success and failure. It’s like someone once said, “If you think you’re going to fail, or if you think you’re going to succeed, you’re right.”
So next time you get nervous about something, get in harmony with your optimistic side. Have confidence in music and in life. Even if you make a mistake, keep going. No one will notice.
I’m constantly amazed at the places that potential learning opportunities pop-up. I often drive down a country road near a Civil War battlefield. I usually find the rural scenery relatively relaxing.
One day, I happened to notice something that I had somehow missed on all my previous trips by the fields along the road. Right in the middle of one of the fields stood a tree. It was only about 25 or 30 feet tall, but I was nevertheless taken somewhat aback that a tree had somehow managed to grow right in the middle of the field.
When I took a closer look, I saw the secret to the tree’s survival. It had sprouted in the edge of a ditch, out of reach from plows, tractors and other equipment that would have ended it’s life if it was anywhere else.
It reminded me that there are times in life when we have to find a spot away from harmful distractions that keep us from growing and accomplishing our goals. If we’re where we supposed to be, we should develop an attitude of persistence while avoiding the people and things that would hold us back.
While the tree is not very big, I can tell that it has been around for at least 10 years of so. It grew nearly sideways early in it’s life but later headed skyward as it was meant to do.
Sometimes, we have to take a different route than originally planned, but if we keep trying, we’ll find a way to where we need to be. In time, our patience will be rewarded.
I’m not sure what kind of tree it is, but I know that it has made it through thunderstorms, drought and snow showers. It wouldn’t stand out in a forest, but it certainly stands out in the middle of the field.
If we find our mission in life, we’ll have the strength to carry it out. Power comes to those who know where they’re going.
Next time you feel a little pressure, remember that persistence, patience and power can help you grow despite your circumstances.
I just finished watching the USA women move into the semi-finals of the World Cup soccer tournament. In case you missed it, the United States team was behind until Abby Wambach scored a goal just before the game ended.
Earlier, it seemed like everything was going against the team, including several questionable calls. But the U.S. players ended up winning on penalty kicks when goalie Hope Solo made a great save and Ali Krieger made the winning kick.
I took away a few lessons from the game. I learned similar lessons from Landon Donavan last year.
The first is, as Jim Valvano often said, “Never, give up!” ESPN’s Jeff Carlisle says the game was a triumph of self-belief over skill.
The U.S. players kept playing even when it seemed like they were surely going to lose. Abby Wambach’s header into the goal came in time that was added to the end of the game because injuries earlier.
The second lesson is that sometimes you need to keep trying even if you fail the first few times.
U.S. player Megan Rapinoe had made a number of passes that had not found their mark, but her pass to Wambach was a thing of beauty. Rapinoe kicked it to the absolutely best spot for Wambach to score.
The third lesson was something I almost missed, have confidence.
I watched the replay about 10 times. On about the third, I noticed that Wambach raised her hand just before Rapinoe kicked the ball toward her.
Wambach wanted the ball to come to her, even though several players from Brazil were around. She wanted it, she got it and she tied the game because of it.
The next time you face an obstacle in your business or in life, have confidence, keep trying and never give up.
NOTE — Today’s blog post was written by Jason Lewis, who gives his thoughts on the power of choosing our own path in the world.
When I think about what makes life so great, my mind always comes back to the same thing — freedom. The freedom to live our lives however we choose is in my mind, without a doubt, the most exciting thing life has to offer us.
photo credit: thelastminute
We have the power and the privilege to live our lives however we see fit and that gift should never be taken for granted. We, as Americans, live in a world where much is provided for us at a reasonable rate. As long as one possesses a job of some sort, one can have the basic necessities of life without very much trouble at all. A roof over your head, food, running water, electricity, as well as the added luxuries of television, cell phones, internet and transportation can all be afforded, to some degree, on even the most meager of incomes due to the society we’ve built in this country.
While one might say that that’s a good thing, I would strongly argue the other side. I believe that because of this, too many people have lost their drive, their desire to be great and achieve things others thought impossible. The world we live in today was built on the shoulders of great men and women who used their minds as tools to discover ways to make a positive, lasting impact on the world and to help better the lives of those around them. But sadly, that all seems to be changing.
Television, movies and the internet reach the vast majority of the free world and influence our decisions more than ever. We’re consumed by these things and we’ve become slaves to them. They tell us how to dress, how to talk and what to think. Because of this, more and more of us are becoming insecure and fearful, causing us to express our creativity less, for fear of what others will think, and that is stunting our individual growth as well as our growth as a society. Instead of thinking for ourselves and encouraging others to do the same, we’re afraid to express new ideas and we often ridicule those that do.
This type of behavior will be our undoing if we don’t do something to change this terrible culture we’ve adopted and start helping others realize their unlimited potential to be and do whatever it is they want to be and do. But just talking about this won’t be enough to change. Gandhi taught us that in order to induce change, we must become the change we wish to see in others.
These are powerful words when carefully considered. Many of us recognize that something is wrong but lack the drive, determination and thought to actually do something about it. And that brings me to my original point – we all have the power to choose the direction our life goes in and I choose to be a part of the solution, not the problem.
Network Marketing provides everyday people with an opportunity to control not only their own life, but to help others live the life that they deserve as well. In order to succeed at it, you must first work on yourself and turn yourself into the person you desire to be and by your guidance and example, you will help others do the same for themselves. When this happens, not only does it help to create better people, it provides us with the freedom to live our lives any way we see fit.
No other industry on the face of this Earth can provide such a thing to anyone who chooses to reap its rewards. I am proud to be part of that culture and I look forward to the journey that lies ahead. To be a network marketer is to have the power to change lives in the palm of your hand. There is no substitute for that gift and it’s one I will not waste.
Have you ever given any serious thought to how you ended up in the job you have?
I’ve been thinking a lot about that lately. I was talking with a friend about it the other day and he was telling me about the path that led him to his current position. I didn’t tell him this for fear of offending him, but his description unnerved me quite a bit.
It seemed he ended up where he was because of a series of unrelated events that had little to do with his strengths, talents, gifts or desires. What made it worse was his apparent reluctance to consider any alternatives at any point along the way or even now.
I was just about to question him about it, when I realize that until recently my life was much the same. I thought that I was where I was and there wasn’t much I could do about it.
Fortunately, I’ve come to realize that I am where I am because of my past choices, and I can change direction by making different choices.
It’s not easy, but it can be done. Think about it. If you want something different, change direction. Decide and do it.
Steve DeVane
When I was young, I loved to play sports. Basketball was my favorite, but I liked other games, too.
Most of the games I played were pick-up games in the backyard or in the street. One of my friends even painted yard lines on our street so we could play football.
But I also played some organized sports. Some of my favorite memories came from playing church-league basketball and softball games.
One year, my cousin’s father, Jack Llull, said that he’d coach our softball team. Now, most of the guys on the team were pretty decent athletes, but I didn’t think we were going to be that great.
That year I found out how much difference a coach can make. Mr. Llull knew softball (and I found out later most every sport) like no one I’d ever known.
He’d pay attention to the smallest details. When a player on the other team hit the ball we always had them played perfectly. It seemed like they’d always hit the ball right where we were playing.
When we were at bat, Mr. Llull had a rule. We could never hit until we had a strike and we could never hit if we had three balls and only one strike.
There was only one exception to the rule. We could hit away when Mr. Llull, who always coached third base, would say, “Now’s the time.”
I loved it when I’d come up to hit and I’d look down at Mr. Llull and he’d say, “Now’s the time, Steve.“
I’d almost always get a great pitch to hit. I was so excited, I usually knocked the tar out of the ball. I think I hit better that year than ever.
One day I asked Mr. Llull why he only let us hit like that in certain situations. When he explained it, I understood it immediately.
When he was coaching third base, Mr. Llull was studying the pitcher. He first determined whether or not the pitcher could control where he pitched it.
If the pitcher didn’t have much control, we had to keep waiting until we got a strike to hit it. We usually walked a lot, which helped us score runs.
But sometimes, the pitcher was pretty good and could pitch strikes and balls whenever he wanted. After a while the pitcher would start figuring out that we were never swinging until we got a strike. So he’d start grooving the first pitch down the middle trying to get ahead in the count.
That was when we’d hear Mr. Llull say, “Now’s the time.”
I didn’t realize it at the time, but Mr. Llull taught me about more than just softball.
First I learned to be observant.
I had played a lot of softball and had never paid much attention to what the pitcher was doing until I got up to bat. It didn’t occur to me that what happened to the batter before me or even several batters before me might impact what the pitcher pitches to me.
In life, opportunities sometimes come along in unexpected ways. If we’re not paying attention, we might miss them. We can learn from our mistakes, but we can also learn from our successes. And we can learn from the experiences of others.
Next, I learned that there are times to be patient and there are times to act.
We were always excited to hear the words that meant we could swing, but often it was just as important that the batters before us had walked because they didn’t swing when they shouldn’t have.
There are times in life when planning and analysis are needed. But there are also times to act, times to move forward and do what needs to be done.
Finally, I learned how everything fits together in softball and in life. That year, we won the regular season softball championship. We didn’t have the best players, but we were the best team.
In life, we often get too focused on ourselves and our situations. To be successful, it takes a team. As we help others, we often help ourselves.
After that year, I was a better softball player and a better person.
Coach Llull, I never told you that, and now it seems like I might not get that chance. I’ve got a feeling you knew anyway.
Steve DeVane
A friend of mine is a huge Tony Robbins fan. He told me the other day that Robbins says that one of the most important decisions you can make to ensure you long-term happiness is to decide to use whatever life gives you in the moment.
According to my friend, Robbins says there’s nothing you can’t accomplish if:
1. You clearly decide what it is that you’re absolutely committed to achieving,
2. You are willing to take massive action,
3. You notice what’s working or not, and
4. You continue to change your approach until you achieve what you want, using whatever life gives you along the way.
I think Robbins provides an excellent blueprint for living and for life.
First, decide where you want to go. I’ve come to see one of my purposes in life is to help people decide where they should go and how best to get there. Don’t just take off without deciding where to go. If you don’t you might be headed in the wrong direction.
Next, take action. The best plans aren’t worth squat if you don’t do what it takes to carry them out. Robbins takes it a step further, suggesting “massive action.” If you want to live your dreams and own your life, you have to go after it in a big way.
Then, assess the situation as you go. Notice what’s working and what isn’t, Robbins says. When you start taking massive action, invariably some things will work and some won’t. Keep doing the things that work, but jettison the ones that don’t.
Finally, continue to adjust until you’re getting the results you want. Think of it like taking a trip in your car. You never go in a straight line from your house to your destination. That would take you through houses and trees and all kinds of things.
Instead, you make turns and take curves, constantly adjusting your path, but staying on course throughout the journey.
For more thoughts on Tony Robbins and his philosophy, check out this thread at Your World Your Life, a personal development forum.
Steve DeVane
This free e-book helped get my business and my life headed in the right direction.
I went to my daughters’ school athletic banquet tonight. Team after team went to the stage as their coaches told about the seasons they had this year.
Each coach told about how his or her team came together, each in different ways.
Some coaches talked about adversity that their teams faced. Some had injuries. Some had other challenges. Each had worked their way through them.
One coach talked about nicknames that his team had adopted for each other. Clearly this brought the team closer together.
Another coach talked about the goals the team had strived to reach.
But the most inspirational words of the night came from seniors who had played their last high school games.
One talked of how he was grateful to have had a school that allowed him to participate in athletics.
Another talked about how sports had taught her the power of teamwork.
Another talked of how athletics taught her leadership skills.
All this got me thinking of how each member of each team gave up part of their individuality for the good of the team.
A star basketball player had to learn how to make the other players better.
A softball player had to switch positions to make the team better.
All this got me thinking of how I can improve the teams of which I am a part.
First I can look at the overall goals of the team instead of just my goals. If the team is doing well, I’m doing well.
Next, I can decide how my talents and my gifts can fit into the team. I’m on each team because I contribute to it. I can look at what part of my strengths will fit into the needs of the team.
Finally, I can look for ways to improve myself in every situation. The seniors athletes didn’t just go through the motions in their sports. They looked at how they could improve themselves in each game.
If we’ll look, we can find ways to improve ourselves in the situations we face. Do that and we’ll be winners no matter the score.
Steve DeVane
This network marketing system constantly teaches me how to improve my life and business.